NBC Suits may be warm, but I dont suggest sleeping in them.
Not long ago, at least it seems, I was out in the middle of the South Carolina woods on my final 7 day “FTX” (Field Training Exercise) of basic training for the U.S.Army.
Here’s some quick back round before I dive head first into this story 99% of the 10 viewers I’ve had on my blog will not understand.
I was 3rd squad leader of 4th platoon of 313th Infantry Unit. My best friend in basic training, PVT Parker, was in my squad. Arrival at the final campsite where we would spend our last three days consisted of forming a perimeter around our camp, setting up firing positions, hooch’s, and 1 foxhole (about 5 ft deep, 6 feet across, more than big enough to burry a body in) in each squad (total of 4 squads in our platoon).
Now back to the story….
At night fall, the Drill Sergeant for my platoon made his rounds to each squad and informed the squad leaders that we were to construct a guard schedule and we were to have 2 men up at all times, in the fox hole.
Fuck… my squad is going to LOVE this news.
So me being the coolest guy, decide to take the middle shift, meaning I get the least sleep. I only get 2 hours of sleep before I get woke up for my shift, 2 hours on shift, and 1 hour of sleep out of a total of 6. Being the squad leader, I’m up an hour before everyone.)
“Parker, I want you to take third shift with Branson, Ill have Cruz and Donny take the First. Get some sleep, and what ever you do.. DO NOT SLEEP ON GUARD DUTY AGAIN”
“Roger that”
First shift went very smooth, I was woke up about 15 minutes early, to gather my gear, knock the sleep monkeys off my shoulder, and get to the foxhole. I stared at a line of trees/bushes/shrubs for 2 hours, and went to wake Parker up.
“Parker, wake up, get Branson, report to the fox hole in 15 minutes”
“Roger that”
So there I am, about 0445 in the morning, about 20 minutes into my sleep and I hear coughing, gagging, groaning and…
FRONT!!!!!! BACK!!!!!! GOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
Shit.. it’s the Drill Sergeant and he’s hemming someone up. I scramble for my gear, my weapon, and my KPOD, and run like hell down to the fox hole where all this commotion is coming from. Upon arrival, I see PVT Parker, in FULL NBC Gear (Nuclear, Biological, and Chemical gear. Heavy as hell, and it includes the gas mask) doing front back and goes, puking, sweating, and groaning… The best part is, an empty canister of CS gas lies at the bottom of the fox hole in the grenade dugout. The air still stings the eyes and throat, even though the canister must have gone dead 5 minutes ago.
“PFC GARDNER, 3RD SQUAD LEADER REPORTING, DRILL SERGEANT”
“Well isn’t it fucking nice for you to show up, “PFC” Gardner. PFC MY FUCKING ASS. WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SOLDIER DOING SLEEPING IN THIS GOD DAMN FOX HOLE”
Me being the wise ass I have all ways been, and will all ways be replies:
“LOOKS LIKE HE WAS TIRED, DRILL SERGEANT!!!!!”
“GET THE FUCK UP PARKER. Get your eyes washed out, hydrate, and get your ass to your hooch and rack out. GARDNER!!! GET THE FUCK DOWN!!!
At this point, I snap down into what is called the Front Leaning Rest Position, a position that you are at when you are going to start doing push ups. I lock my elbows, make sure my body is parallel to the ground, and stay in that position
“Oh, so we’re mister fucking sarcastic. PUSH!!!!!!”
So here I am, being responsible, reporting to the drill sergeant as one of my squad members was being ‘corrected’ and end up completely in that soldiers shoes. getting the shit smoked out of me. I mean were talking about pushups, front back and go’s, flutter kicks… all because one of my squad members decided to take a SLEEPING BAG, and wear his NBC gear in the fox hole because he was tired and cold. Yeah, we laughed about it after graduation in AIT, but I swear to god, that was my most miserable night in basic training. I got about 2:30 hours of sleep in 2 days of continuous work and drills, very little food, and the food I did have I was profusely puking up on the floor during this ‘corrective action’. That lesson has taught me one thing. No matter how close a friend is, you can never trust them to do the right thing when self preservation has kicked in.
